“What are your plans for the estate?” Asked Angie.
“The Estate? Is that what we’re calling it now?” Replied Jason, tersely. “It’s a small two up, two down and some fairly meagre savings. It’s hardly Blenheim Palace.”
“I know that, I’m just reaching for something to call it.”
“You’re right. I didn’t mean to make fun of you. It just sounds so grandiose.” Jason leaned forward in his chair. It creaked slightly, as if it was a bit long in the tooth for such activity. He refilled his wine glass from the bottle of Rosé on the table and sat back, the last rays of the setting sun giving the liquid a hue that belied it’s bargain origins. His was not a refined enough palette to really care about the taste as long as it got him fairly tipsy.
“Dad really did like you, you know.” Angie knew this last might be pushing it a little, but she cared about her brother and knew that getting their father’s affairs in order must be taking a lot out of him. She stood up and walked through the French windows to the kitchen to fetch some matches. She wanted to light the scented candle on the table between them, as much to see Jason’s face in the dusk as to ward off the inevitable mosquitoes that would arrive as the summer evenings set in.
“I do wish you wouldn’t talk about him in the past tense.” He called after her. “It doesn’t look great, I’ll admit. But all this paperwork and lawyers and so forth is just being thorough. I’m not saying I’m not trying to prepare myself, I’m just not willing to accept he’s gone just yet. As for him liking me, I know that. We didn’t always see eye-to-eye and we’ve both got a bit of a temper, but I don’t think we ever hated each other.” Jason sighed as Angie returned with the matches. “Look, a lot of people – apparently, you included – think me and the old man never got on. That’s not true. I just wanted to get out and do things for myself. I wasn’t running away from him or Mum… or you.” He took a moment and looked away, summoning his thoughts.
Jason loathed this type of familial introspection, Angie meant well but it seemed like she wanted the type of family that ‘other people’ had. Like other people’s families were any different. They all had their strengths and weaknesses, their little dysfunctions. Theirs was no different.
Angie struck a match, lit the candle and sat down slowly in her chair. Her face showed concern and not a little bit of pity. “But you fought so much…” She left the statement hanging. Hoping it would draw Jason out, get him to open up a bit.
“Because we were so similar.” Jason stressed the last word, hoping it would have some impact. He knew what Angie was doing and he didn’t mind too much. He just worried that the answers she was looking for – if there were any – weren’t his to give. “It took me awhile to realise that. Besides, I was in my teens when we really used to go at each other. Who doesn’t fall out with their parents at that age?”
“I suppose you’re right.” Angie let out a resigned sigh. This hadn’t gone at all how she’d hoped and she sat back into a gloomy silence.
“Look, I know you want some type of resolution to things but I, for one, don’t think life affords us that comfort. We just have to make do with the way things are.” And Jason sat back himself, unsure of what point he’d just made but not willing to carry this on any further.
They both stared out at the countryside, alone in their thoughts, the only sound the occasional gust of wind through the trees and the faint buzzing of insects.
The true magnitude of what was happening to them, to their family, had only recently begun to manifest itself in full to the pair of them. They had a lot to do in the coming days and weeks. He could do without the navel-gazing for now. There was time enough for that. At least, he hoped there would be.
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